Nancy Dadami

Create Sacred Space Within You And Around You

Stop Falling Out Of The Flow State And How To Get Back In Flow

by @elioverbey

Your inner voice chatters at you all day long. Right now, it is hovering over you. “You are not checking off enough tasks on your to-do list. There is only 1 hour left in your workday and you are behind.”

Panic sets in and you launch into hyper-drive. You must complete the day’s tasks, no matter how long it takes. The mantra “work harder, work harder” fills your thoughts.

Instead of working harder you feel anxious, overwhelmed and stressed. You fall out of the flow state. Your productivity plummets. You are out of ideas. You think if you work harder and longer you will check all the tasks off the list.

Working harder is not the answer.

What is the flow state?

When you are in the flow state you are alert and fully engaged. It is an energized and happy state where you are immersed in your project or actions. 

You are without self-consciousness, doubt or judgment. When you are in the flow state you are confident, creative and tasks fall together with ease.

Flow is a positive and uplifting state of being.

Unlike hyper-drive, being in the flow has no anxiety, stress, overwhelm or other negative emotions associated with it. Negative emotions block your ability to get into and stay in the flow state.

Your project was moving forward with ease, you were in the flow. Then you started to worry about finishing the list. You immediately left the flow and popped into stress. 

The mantra “work harder, work harder” kicked in and you need an intervention to stop that negative thinking.

How Are You Showing Up?

It starts with knowing how you show up. What do you bring to your to-do list? Are you excited, positive, and confident? Or do you complain, dread, and worry?

You take who you are (your mindset, beliefs, experience, etc.) into every situation, creative endeavor and relationship.

Who are you at the moment? You can only be as good as you are at the moment whether you are happy, confident, or stressed.

You have a personal energy field within you and around you that impact your thoughts, actions and flow. This energy field is influenced by your thoughts, feelings, and level of self-care.

How To Get back Into The Flow State?

Your project was moving forward with ease, you were in the flow. Then you started to worry about finishing the list. You immediately left the flow and popped into stress.  The mantra “work harder, work harder” kicked in and you need an intervention to stop that negative thinking.

Scientific studies show that you are more productive and efficient when you take breaks from your “to do” list. Research reveals you get more done when you take a 5-minute break every twenty minutes.  The break gives your brain the time it needs to refresh and replenish before continuing to work. It helps create a state of flow.

What can you do during that 5-minute break that will replenish you, boost your personal power and move you back into the flow?

A Flow Alignment Technique

When I fall out of the flow state or take my 5-minute break here is one flow alignment technique I use:

I move away from my desk and do this simple breathing flow alignment technique.

Notice:

  • What are your feelings or emotions?
  • Is your mind racing or is it calm?
  • Scan your body for places that are tight or hurt. Make a mental not of it.
  • Notice your breathing. Is it mostly in your chest or in your belly?

Here Are The Steps For One Flow Alignment Technique

Step #1 – Close your eyes and take a slow deep breath.

Step #2 – Breathe a slow deep breath again. This time imagine your body expanding up through your head and down through your tailbone

Step #3 – Breathe a slow deep breath in again and imagine your body expanding from side to side. Imagine your ribs lead the way.

Step #4 – Breathe in again and imagine your body expanding from front to back

Step #5 – Put it all together by breathing in and imagine your body is a balloon filling up with air in all directions

Step #6 – Repeat these steps at least 3 to 9 times and you will feel refreshed and energized.

Step #7 – Revisit the noticing process you did before you began the breathing. Do you notice a shift and one or more areas?

This is a quick technique that can be used several times a day to replenish you and reset your personal energy field to a state of flow. You don’t have to worry about that to-do list anymore because you have a flow alignment technique.

You may also want to read this article Personal Power Where Do You Stand?

Nancy Dadami is an Intentional Flow Strategist, Energy Reader, and Mentor. She teaches smart, strong, successful Baby Boomers and Gen X’ers to understand “the flow” and find peace of mind in their life & business.

3 Must-Have Qualities To Strengthen Your Relationships

by @elioverbey

Would you say you have close relationships with family, friends, colleagues or community? Do you feel uplifted or happier when you connect or socialize with them? Does a problematic relationship create stress, anger, anxiety or fear for you?

Did you know your relationships can be a health risk factor just like high blood pressure, smoking, alcoholism, lack of exercise and obesity? According to researchers at Brigham Young University, strong social relationships are associated with better health and longevity. It is good for your health and well-being to cultivate strong meaningful relationships.

What Makes A Strong Relationship?

Think about one of your strong relationships. It could be with family, a friend or, a colleague. What do you think makes it strong?

Now reflect on a relationship that is problematic for you. Why do you think it is difficult?

You take who you are into every relationship. What are your core values, personality style, temperament, expectations, wounds from past relationships, and hopes? Who and what are you taking into your relationships?

When you have relationship problems it is crucial that you reflect on who you are and what you are taking into your relationships.

I know you want to point out that the other person in the relationship should look at what they bring to the relationship too and I agree they should. Remember, you have no control over what they do. You only have control and responsibility for what you bring and how you act and communicate.

Here are 3 qualities every relationship must have to grow and thrive. Take time to reflect and ask yourself where you are strong and where you could improve.

3 Qualities Every Strong Relationship Must Have To Grow And Thrive.

#1 is Respect -how you feel about someone and how you treat them. You act in a way that shows you care about their feelings and well-being.

When you have a conversation with someone your words and actions show your true value of them and your relationship.

Communication can be challenging, especially when you are emotional. However, when you respect someone you find a way to communicate that honors who they are and lets you get your point across without anger or criticism.

I had a therapist tell me “When everything is going great relationships are easy. When a problem comes up it is like making tea. You never know what is in the tea bag (relationship) until you put it into hot water.” The hot water brings out the positive and negative aspects of each of us.

If respect is a core value for you and you are respectful to others your relationships can be fulfilling, supportive, and add to your happiness and well-being.

There is no moving forward or connecting at a deep meaningful level without respect.

#2 is Empathy – the ability to understand the thoughts, feelings, and experience of another without judgment. The ability to put yourself in another person’s shoes and see a situation from the other’s perspective.

Have you ever had expectations in a relationship that did not get met? You might have been disappointed or even angry at the person that did not meet your expectations. What do you do with those feelings? How do you resolve your feelings? Where in your life do you disappoint or anger people by not meeting their expectations?

“EXPECTATIONS are the termites of relationships. They can eat away the foundations and you may not know it’s happening until the damage is revealed.”

Empathy puts expectations aside and allows you to view a situation from the perspective of the other. What was the situation like for them? How were they feeling? What struggles do they have with the situation? How did my reaction affect them? 

You can learn how to use empathy by stopping to ask yourself the questions above.

What is it like to see this situation from the other person’s point of view?  Does it help you understand them better? Did you learn a new way to see a situation by looking from another perspective?

Everyone wants to be understood. Empathy is the bridge to understanding.

#3 is Humility – a state of being humble.

I don’t know about you, occasionally I want to be right when having a discussion. As soon as I enter that ‘being right” state I slip out of humility and into pride or arrogance which creates communication, respect, and empathy problems in the conversation and possibly in the relationship.

Being present and fully listening to what another has to say without thinking about what you are going to say next shows respect and humility. You feel heard when someone is fully present as they listen to you.

Humble people do not brag or try to show off their power, skill, or possessions. A humble person does not judge others about what they do or how they act. They display an absence of their own self-importance.

When you are humble in relationships you give others the freedom to trust you and the relationship.

Nobody said relationships would be easy all the time. Yet, when you cultivate respect, empathy, and humility you can build strong meaningful relationships that bring you fulfillment, happiness, good health, and longevity.

Nancy Dadami is an Intentional Flow Strategist, Energy Reader, and Mentor. She teaches smart, strong,  women to understand “the flow” and find peace of mind in their life & business.

Why Tiny Habit Tweaks Create Big Results

by @elioverbey

Crystal wakes up in the morning, her mind racing with a list of the tasks she wants to accomplish that day. She checks her email and social media while she waits for her coffee to brew. Then it is off to work in her home office. Crystal is the kind of person that doesn’t think about her routines or habits.

She wishes she was more productive and healthier. She knows some of her habits are getting in the way of the life she desires. She thinks “if I could just organize my time I would fit everything in.” Crystal knows she should exercise regularly to be healthier but she doesn’t have time in her day for that.

Do you have routines or habits that stop you from living the life you want?

Take a moment and think about your routines and habits. What could you accomplish in a week, a month, or even a year if you created tiny habits today and kept building on them over time?

Trying to make huge changes all at once usually leads to overwhelm or failure because it is hard to make big changes all at once; However by taking small steps with tiny habits toward a bigger goal you realize it is doable, sustainable, and a path to success.

Habits of all kinds–both good and bad–have compounding effects, which means the more you do something, the greater the results.

The more often you lace up those sneakers and get out there, the sooner you’ll achieve better heart health, more energy, and greater motivation to stick with your new habit.

Likewise, the more frequently you eat processed food, drink alcohol, smoke, skip exercising, or partake in other unhealthy habits, the more health problems you’ll have over time.

What is a Tiny Habit?

Tiny habits are those small actions we take every day without thinking about it. Brushing your teeth, checking your email, washing your face, and making your bed. Some of our habits we were taught as kids and others we taught ourselves.

Tiny habits are also quick and easy, sometimes less than two minutes, therefore we don’t even notice them taking up any time out of our day.

Try adding a new tiny habit for 2 minutes a day. In the sneaker example above, certainly you need much more time than two minutes to improve your health benefits; but adding an extra two minutes to your current running/walking workout is negligible. Adding another two minutes the next week you probably still won’t notice. However, if youKeep increasing your time by two minutes and soon enough you’ll be running/walking longer distances.

Adding these small increments of time is sustainable and harmless whereas thinking you can run/walk a 26.2-mile marathon when your current training is only 30-minutes long is simply foolish.  

Every single area of your life can be improved with the help of tiny habits; just do a bit of soul-searching to decide where you want to focus or what specifically needs improving.

Having a goal in mind will lead you in the right direction and these tiny habits will build the processes necessary to reach those goals.

Health

Create a tiny habit to drink more water or to eat more fruits and vegetables daily. Plan to have fresh fruits, vegetables, and bottled water handy. Within a few weeks, your body will be craving more water and preparing produce with meals will become second nature.

You can also create a tiny habit to get more movement. It takes me 2 minutes to lay out my walking clothes, shoes, visor, and sunglasses next to the bed. In the morning, there is no thinking, I jump up, put on my clothes, sneakers and hit the road.

Relationships

You have many types of relationships to choose from here. There is the relationship with yourself, spouse or partner, family, friends, colleagues, clients, community, and world.

Create a tiny habit to reconnect with yourself each morning and throughout the day. You could spend 2 minutes focusing on your breath. It helps you focus and stay present to what you are doing. When I was a high school principal, I would go into the restroom stall (the only place people would not interrupt me) and breathe for 2 minutes to keep me focused and present.

If you have more time, create a tiny habit to spend 10 minutes reconnecting with your spouse/partner at the end of the day. After awhile you will find yourself looking forward to that time of connecting and your relationship will get stronger.

Think of a relationship you want to improve and create your own tiny habit to implement.

Business

Create firm business hours–especially if you work from home. Nobody wants their work to leak into their personal time.

Have you heard of the Pomodoro Technique?  When you can use it you get more done. Studies show that the brain responds better to short sessions with a break away from your work. Try it so you can complete projects or meet deadlines faster.

The Pomodoro Technique is as simple as using a kitchen timer to block off 25-minute increments where you focus on a task until the timer rings. Take a 5-minute break. Get up walk around, refresh your tea, use the restroom, and then reset the timer for the next 25-minute session.

These are just a few ideas; you’re only limited by your own creativity and by what aspect of your life you need to focus on and want to improve.

You can build a big new habit by implementing tiny habits every day.

MOTIVATION Is What Gets You Started.

HABIT Is What Keeps You Going.

~Jim Rohn

Want more help with productivity? Check out this Free Productivity Challenge http://nancyhelps.me/Productivity Challenge offered by Connie Ragen Green, a mentor of mine. I am currently in the challenge and it is making a big difference for me in my personal and professional life.

You might also want to read these articles about mindset:http://nancyhelps.me/Mindset1 and http://nancyhelps.me/Mindset2

Nancy Dadami is a Feng Shui Master by trade, an Artist at heart, and a Teacher from her Soul. She teaches open-minded people to unlock their potential and tap into their Inner Magnificence to live a life of purpose and meaning.

Feel scattered? Blame Your Headboard

by @elioverbey

Do you ever feel scattered? Shaky? Powerless? Or ungrounded? It could have something to do with the headboard on your bed. The feelings you have are related to your surroundings. That may sound crazy to you right now, stick with me and find out why.

Purpose of the headboard

The purpose of having a headboard is to create stability, personal power, and a feeling of being grounded in the world.

The headboard should be attached to the bed and placed against the wall. I have seen headboards away from the wall from a few inches to several feet creating a feeling of being scattered and having trouble being organized for the person who sleeps there.

What kind of headboard is best?

A solid wooden headboard is best to support stability, personal power, and a feeling of being grounded in the world. That means no headboards with slats or open spaces that allow you to see the wall behind the headboard.

Slats or open spaces that allow you to see the wall behind the headboard do not give you the energetic strength you need to rejuvenate yourself as you sleep.

A metal headboard is weaker than a wooden headboard and does not support the qualities you need from your headboard.

Creative headboards

You can make a wooden headboard for your bed and add design by carving shapes into it, painting it a color to match your decor, or cover it with fabric. All these headboards mentioned have a solid wood foundation, which is what you need.

A bookcase headboard is possible to use if it meets the criteria mentioned above:

  • It is made of wood  
  • Attached to the bed
  • Against the wall. If it is heavy is should be attached to the wall also.
  • No open spaces to see the wall. If the bookcase has a solid back it could work.
  • You can use the bookcase to showcase a few things of importance to you. Be careful not to fill it up with too much stuff or you will defeat the purpose of having a headboard.

A headboard is important to help you create the energy of stability, personal power, and feeling grounded in the world. 

Nancy Dadami is a Flow Specialist, Creatively Fit Coach, and Intuitive, teaching you how to get Better Flow Faster so you can live a life you love

Will Feng Shui In A Bedroom Help Cure Insomnia?

by @elioverbey

Margie was an emergency room nurse. She knew she was making a difference, like the time she held a woman’s hand that was terrified because she was traveling, away from home and came into the emergency room hemorrhaging. Margie was calm, held the woman’s hand, wiped away her tears, and talked with the woman until she was calm.

Margie called me for help. She had was not sleeping through the night. Often, she would wake up to go to the bathroom, get back in bed only to toss and turn. Her sleeplessness was beginning to cause health problems.

feng shui nancy dadami
sleep at last

There are many factors that contribute to insomnia and the design of your surroundings is one of the contributors. If you get everything else taken care of and you do not address the energy of your surroundings you will still have insomnia problems.

The goal of Feng Shui is to keep the energy flowing through your surroundings. When that happens you are healthy, happy, and prosperous.

There are many design details in a bedroom that impact sleep. These are 3 levels of design to watch for:

Clutter

If your room has too much furniture or the furniture is too big for the space the energy cannot flow and the result is clutter, slow moving energy which can lead to sleep problems.

Is the room disorganized, your stuff is everywhere – on top of the dresser, on the floor, drawers are crammed full, the closet is stuffed, the nightstand is messy, and books are stacked on the floor waiting to be read. This in some

Are there clothes scattered around your bedroom? These fit into the clutter category and can impact your ability to get a good night’s sleep.

Color

Bedroom colors should be soothing to the soul. Soothing colors are subtle shades of green, blue, tan, and pink which help to calm the nervous system, helping to reduce insomnia.

 Reds, oranges, and yellows excite the nervous system and make sleep more difficult. 

You could paint your bedroom a neutral color and add soothing accents as pillows, bedspread, and artwork.

Design Details

Where the bedroom located in the home, visible beams, placement of the bed, and storage under the bed all impact insomnia.

A bedroom towards the back of the house, away from the street is the quietest and most relaxing for your nervous system.

Many bedrooms have visible beams on the ceiling as design features. Energetically, the beam puts heavy pressure on whatever is beneath it. If your bed is under a beam, you may find it difficult to sleep through the night.

The ideal placement of the bed is to have the head of the bed against a wall that is facing the door and furthest from the door, allowing you to see the door while lying in bed. This allows your nervous system to completely relax, making it easier to fall asleep and stay asleep.

The goal of Feng Shui is to keep the energy flowing through your space. Energy flows around your surroundings even while you sleep. It is best to have nothing under your bed so the energy can flow freely and help rejuvenate you as you sleep.

I have worked with people that have incorporated these 3 levels of design to find they got a full night’s sleep.

Margie had a beam in her bedroom above her bed. The pressure of the beam was across the middle of her body, causing discomfort and adding to her insomnia. She did not have her bed in the ideal placement either, another design detail that can contribute to sleeplessness. When she moved her bed to the ideal placement she was no longer under the beam. She called to tell me after those Feng Shui adjustments she was sleeping through the night.